In my last post about fertility and our desire to have another baby, I spoke about my irregular periods, upping my fat intake to level out my hormones, and the possibility of taking clomid to get me to drop an egg! The putting on fat part was quite easy– a lot less running and more calories. Boom, 2 pounds in the blink of an eye. Still, I didn’t really think I was ovulating so I just had it in my mind that we would need to wait until my next period and then we’d start the clomid. However, something it me kept me from going to the pharmacy to pick it up. I decided I would wait until I started and then go get it right away. No sense in spending the money if my period never came, right? So we waited. We waited and I took pregnancy tests like multiple times per day when my period was “late” (which really means nothing when your cycle is irregular). I was using cheap-o’s so I didn’t care that I’d go through multiple a day.
One afternoon, when I was tossing Leif’s diaper in the garbage, I noticed that one of the test strips I had thrown out had double lines. Wait? What? My heart skipped. Obviously, it was way past the 5 minute “read by” limit. I took another one right that moment. And sure enough, after about 4 minutes, the faintest positive line appeared. So faint I thought I was making it up. I sent a photo to a friend. She was certain it was positive. Me, not so much.
The next morning, I took another one. Negative. Sigh. I drove to Target and invested in a 2-pack of digitals. Negative (my pee was pretty diluted by that point in the AM). I put it out of my mind that I could be pregnant. I impatiently waited until the next morning. My bladder woke me up at 4 AM and I rushed down stairs, determined to not let that first pee of the day go to waste. I first tried the cheap-0. Positive. I busted out the last prized digital… my heart pounding out of my chest. The three minutes seemed to take ETERNITY. When YES flashed on the screen, I gasped, covering my mouth so as not to scream with joy and wake the house up. With hands in prayer, I placed them on my forward and let out a “Thank you, Thank you, Thank you.”
It’s two weeks later. Because I have such irregular cycles, my midwife ordered an early ultrasound to date the pregnancy. I so anxiously awaited that appointment. On Monday, I got to glimpse at that little sweet pea and see the little waves of the heart beat (117/min–perfect). The ultrasound put me about two weeks behind what I had thought but I know its not a perfect science and Leif came right smack in the middle of my original due date and the due date I was given after my ultrasound. So, I’m just over 6 weeks and expecting an early July baby. Come on, Summer!
I’m thrilled to be pregnant. I’ve wanted this for the last couple of years. While I tried to prepare myself mentally for the physical shift, it still is hard. With Leif, and with this pregnancy, my body changed a lot in the first trimester. I have already put on a couple more pounds and my pants are feeling uncomfortable already. My tummy is not the washboard it was over the summer. But then again, I couldn’t get pregnant over the summer… From a body image point, the first trimester is the hardest for me. The medical world says you shouldn’t gain more than 5 pounds in those first months but I have already gained 3-4 (okay, 1 or two of those were before I got pregnant) and I have 6 weeks to go in this trimester. I gained between 5-10 in my first trimester with Leif and I remember feeling a little shamed by my health care provider–like I was subtly told I needed to slow it down. Then, it leveled off and the last month of my pregnancy I was told I needed to gain more! sigh. I, of course, delivered a perfect, 7 pound healthy baby boy.
After talking to and reading stories about other athletic women and their weight gain during pregnancy, I’m finding that women who are training at relatively high levels tend to gain more in the first trimester than average women. Why? Well, I think for one, our bodies need the extra cushion. We have less body mass/fat to begin with so our body compensates to sustain the pregnancy. Also, for me, the intensity of my training has gone down significantly. I don’t feel like myself. My energy levels are low and I just don’t have the stamina to run 10 miles at 7 min/miles right now. Also, I’m recovering from an injury. To top that all off, I’m eating heartier foods than I do in the summer. Its a perfect storm for putting on a little extra cush– pregnancy hormones/need for fat, exhaustion, nausea, lowered training, increased calorie in take…
Yesterday I was feeling pretty gross about my body. The waist band on my leggings was digging and the scale showed a number I haven’t seen since before I got back into running shape post surgery. I started thinking, “oh my god, how am I going to keep my weight under control during the first trimester? What if I gain 60 pounds? I’ll never be fit again!” And then I stopped myself. Time to put the pants that don’t fit away for now, find the ones that do and embrace my changing my body. I might not be going for 20 milers or busting out sub 7 miles but I’m moving my body everyday, I’m eating healthy, and most importantly, my pregnancy appears to be normal and healthy! So, to the crazy perfectionist in my head that says I need to keep my body in check, I say, “Shut the F up.”
I’m beyond grateful to be carrying another human in my body…to have another heart beating within me. To think there will be another little human I love as much as Leif just blows my mind. I’m going to embrace this soft belly and celebrate it as it grows over the next 9 months.
Anyone else tend to gain more than “recommended” in the first couple months of pregnancy?